Plan the marriage, not the wedding.

Charlotte Gomez/ BuzzFeed

“Paid $650 to get my dress altered because my boobs grew and the seamstress didn’t think to reinforce the corset boning. Short story, my dress was about an inch from a nip sitch pretty much my entire wedding/reception with a conservative family. Do your research then double check their work.” – noellel

“Make a separate email for wedding only correspondence with planner, vendors, etc.” – mherndon

Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

“In a few years, no one will remember if you had chair covers, what your cake looked like, or any of the other things you care so much about getting perfect on your wedding day. They will just remember if they had a good time.” –  estreb

“Plan the marriage, not the wedding. The wedding is one day. My marriage is 29 years and counting.” – lisaromanop

Taylor Miller / BuzzFeed

“No matter how much planning and organizing you do a lot of things come down to the last three weeks or so. This is because vendors don’t want to talk to you until just before your wedding. While it may be the biggest thing on your mind it’s just another event in their fully booked schedule.” – titsell

“People are going to RSVP yes and then not show up, and they will also act like it’s no big deal. So you’re going to have a lot of food left over. What I did was donate the extra food to a homeless shelter. Look into that before your big day.” – obviouslygaby

Zoe Burnett/ BuzzFeed

“My biggest regret is spending so much time on the staged photos after the ceremony. All the pictures I love are the candid ones with all my guests, and I wish I had spent more time with them.” – dacpac

“The thing I wished I had realized sooner is that a wedding can be anything you want it to be. It should be a reflection of who you and your partner are – what you enjoy, what makes you happy, whatever best celebrates your relationship and commitment to one another. As long as your guests will be comfortable (i.e. fed and some sort of entertainment) you can do anything you want!” –jthuerrauch

Adam Ellis/ BuzzFeed

“Be prepared that everyone will have opinions, good and bad. Nobody said anything to me personally, but I did hear some annoying things afterward.” – s10l16

“The rings might not go on on the big day. Excitement and stress do weird things to your body, and your fingers might swell. Put baby powder or corn starch on your finger before the ceremony, and don’t force your partner’s ring down all the way if it gets stuck. Nobody will notice that the ring didn’t make it past that last knuckle. Once things are calmer, each person can adjust their own ring comfortably.” – rebeccam

Maritsa Patrinos/ BuzzFeed

“Make sure you have someone responsible for bringing you food. I was so busy taking pictures during cocktail hour, I didn’t get to come in and try the appetizers being passed, but one of my friends who was like my day-of assistant thought to save a plate for me and my husband.” – s10l16

“I wish I had known that not everyone will be overjoyed at the where, the when, or the how (but thankfully ok with the who!) I have found it so helpful to rely on my husband-to-be for reassurance and perspective, and to keep any details that we really like to ourselves, because anything shared before the big day can, and will, invite lots of opinions!” – tracyb

Maritsa Patrinos/ BuzzFeed

“No matter how carefully you plan, something will go wrong. Always have a backup ready, just in case.” – Caircair Hendrix via Facebook

“I’ve had two weddings. Both times, only 85% of the yes RSVPs actually attended. They all explained that emergencies happened and things came up at the last minute, which I understood. However, I hated paying $50 a plate for people who did show. I wish I had known to give a final head count of only about 90% of the yes RSVPs.” – sandras

Terri Pous/ BuzzFeed

“Whenever I’d start to get stressed out over the little things, I kept repeating to myself, “At the end of the day, we’ll be husband and wife and that’s all that really matters.” It helped ground me in what the whole day was about. And hiring a day-of coordinator really helped out in terms of “herding the cats”!” – Leeann Bonaventura via Facebook

Maritsa Patrinos/ BuzzFeed

“Make sure you pack food for your room the night of your wedding… you don’t eat much during the reception and your starving when it’s all said and done.”– kalitah

“That October in North Carolina is still hurricane season. And the people who matter will fight a hurricane to be there.” – Natalie Horner via Facebook